My favorite author is Dave Eggers. He wrote a couple of my favorite books: "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius" (which probably has the best title known to man) and "You Shall Know Our Velocity". He created the publishing house McSweeney's, which has its own website at www.mcsweeneys.net. The website is updated daily with extremely short humorous little things from different authors. It's hard to describe so you should probably just go there and check it out yourself. Anyway I hadn't been in a while so I went to check out what they've been putting up there and I found one that I thought I'd share something from. It's titled "Thrilling Chapter Endings You May Use In Your Next Novel". Here are my favorites:

- "Hold everything!" Dr. Hiller shouted as he burst into the room. "[PROTAGONISTS NAME], my studies conclusively prove that you've been dead this entire time!"

- [PROTAGONIST] grimly shook his head, knowing that his plan was not working, and also that the person reading this book has no idea that right now there is a Mad About You marathon on TV right now.
NOTE: This is a long shot, but if it works, the reader will be totally freaked out.

- [PROTAGONIST] walked down the shore. The wind was howling and the first drops of rain had begun to splatter into the sand.
NOTE: On the opposite page is a notice from the government stating that the act of purchasing your novel has bound the reader to a two-year term of service in the U.S. Army. The reader is ordered to appear at the nearest recruiting office within 24 hours.

Anyway there were a few more that you should check out. Also, you should become and avid-checker-outer of that website because it's just all kinds of awesome.

Wanna give big ups to my brother Aaron on his birthday. I hope you're enjoying all the quality time with the Meyers family in LA for Passover. I TOTALLY wish I could be there to listen to a certain family member's hogwash about aliens and UFOs. Psyyyyyyyyche. Anyway, happy birthday.

And of course, a selection of the weird things I'm thinking about for March of 2007:
...side note: since a certain someone has started to develop a similar list of songs he/she has stuck in his/her head when he/she wakes up, it's started to happen to me as well. THANKS. Songs aren't nearly as weird or fun as these...

March 1, 2007 - "Her? No, she's not pregnant."
March 4, 2007 - "Who would want spaghetti and matzah balls?"
March 5, 2007 - "Whoa. You guys are going to have Rock and Roll sex."
March 7, 2007 - "The abs will last, the kids won't."
March 11, 2007 - "No, I KNOW so."
March 18, 2007 - "But you NEED flippers."
March 19, 2007 - "You ever have a last minute call?"
March 20, 2007 - "Yes, you do. It's funny."
March 23, 2007 - "Meet on the other corner in 2007."
March 25, 2007 - "That's the bad noise."
March 26, 2007 - "Like really really really good deals."
March 27, 2007 - "I don't think the eyes are ready to see him yet."
March 29, 2007 - "I like the palace."
March 31, 2007 - "One hundred seventy-five thousand."

Alright, enough of that. 6 weeks left of school and about 14 tests/quizzes. Do the math.

Listening To: The Dandy Warhols - Horse Pills
Sometimes you feel like Moses
That's when you're toasted.

(Yeah, a little Passover reference right there. Whatcha gonna do about it?)